Mission Are You Fricking Kidding Me?
by The Pootamis
Summary: Payback is a bitch. That is her motto. One person would just have to learn the hard way. You didn't always need to throw fists to solve a problem. You didn't always need to break bones. No you could hurt them where it hurts the most. Their wallets.


It was meant to be an easy life. Such an easy life. A carefree life. Maybe destroy a city here and there. Make a young couple cry before they met their demise. Then he had come along. That disgusting creature known as Cell. A creature that changed everything. Changed their way of thinking. It might have been due to the fact that both had been absorbed by the creature like they were some kind of protein shake. But no matter they had become free thanks to the unlikest of saiyans to defeat Cell. not Goku. Their once sworn enemy. Not Vegeta. The prince of all saiyans or so he claimed to be. No it had been Gohan. He had been the one to defeat Cell. he had been the one to destroy the creature after having the disgusting being spit them up like they were a piece of chewing gum. For that they would be eternally grateful to him. And as such a scheme had been planned.

They would never be able to wreak havoc on this planet. No there was too many warriors now that either equaled their own power levels or worse are far superior than them. But that didn't mean they could have the very best on their side. It had been rather easy to do as well. A little visit over to his home and after a little convincing they had been off far away from the mountains. The once hunters had now become the hunted. They were now considered kidnappers and high value targets of The Z Fighters. If only they knew the truth. It had been Gohan's choice to follow them. So what if a little kiss was delivered here and there by someone that they could see the young saiyan had clearly a crush on. He had followed and has never looked back since.

It now has been seven years since that day and a lot has changed. We're they still being hunted? Yes but not only by The Z Fighters. No they were being hunted by the authorities. The authorities looking for a trio of famous jewel thieves. Robbers that have never been caught. Robbers that have stolen so many high valued objects over the years. Even some right under the noise of stationed guards that had turned their back for a single moment only for them to look back finding glass cases that were once filled with high value jewelry gone. Vanished like the wind leaving so many police cases wide open to the public for anyone that has any sort of information to share. As for the jewels themselves? None have ever been reportedly sold off to any pawn shop or store across the planet. There has been no leads at all making these thefts even more mysterious.

A band of thieves that have no pattern. Have no sort of calling card. But all of that would change on this night. The thieves would be caught on this night. Or so they thought anyways. No a new tactic had been formed. Highly advanced motion sensors have been set up in one particular bank. Laser grids scattered everywhere across the property. Numerous cameras continuing to look through the empty halls for any sort of movement while a couple of guards watch the monitors like hawks as a group of highly trained police officers remain sitting behind them just waiting for something to happen.

But they weren't watching everywhere. They weren't watching the duct system as a long figure crawls her way through the ducts. They weren't aware that the feed that they are watching is nothing but a recording playing back continuous from the night before. If they had known they would become aware of the motion sensors that have gone offline. Of the laser grids that have ceased to exist. Mere child's play for one individual that sits by a computer monitor inside of a parked van overlooking the large bank from high above on a hill in the distance.

A young teenager that continues to watch his girlfriend from the small camera attached to her head making her way through the duct system. He could only imagine what she is muttering to herself right now. Thankfully the static coming from the connection would be gone soon. As for said girlfriend. He was right in saying that she is muttering to herself. In fact muttering would be an understatement. Cursing was more like it.

" Stupid 17! Stupid Gohan! Another bank job? No problem. Added security? No problem. We'll be in and out before anyone even realizes what's happening. Laser grids? No problem gorgeous. I'll take care of that. Motion sensors? No problem sis. I'll disable the devices. Oh by the way. Since you're the smallest just to play it safe you're gonna have to be the one that is going to have to crawl through the dirty,disgusting,rat filled air duct! Stupid 17!"

Glaring angrily down the narrow duct with only the energy ball in her hand lighting her way as she hears the annoying static coming from her ear piece ceasing to exist coming to a stop reaching up Android 18 redirects the camera on her head to her face to narrow her eyes dangerous at the camera.

" When this is all over one of you is so dead."

" **Oh come on 18? Where's your sense of adventure?"**

Narrowing her eyes dangerous at the camera quickly control her anger from seeing the energy ball in her hands growing slightly bigger just as she is about to respond Android 18 silences herself when she hears a shuffle coming from the other line before a cough is heard.

" **Sorry about that gorgeous. Once we're home free i'll make it up to you."**

Feeling her facial features softening slightly nodding her head returning the camera back to where it once was slowly Android 18 continues her trek through the air duct.

" You better."

Rounding a nearby corner finding a duct going in opposite direction quickly going over the blueprints of the building once again through her database without any hesitation slowly Android 18 moves down the duct to the right and continues her journey through the duct for the next few minutes in silence. They have hit every single bank across the globe. All except for this one. But this wasn't any normal bank job. No this one came with a bonus. A little payback against someone. So much so that this job deserved a special trip out here. Out to Satan City. Were they already set for life? Yep they have all the money they would ever need for ten life times. She has all the jewelry that she would ever need. In fact she has her own special room dedicated to their trophies they have collected over the years. But this job is personal. This job was meant to damage another. Damage the pockets of who is considered to be the strongest fighter in the world. A complete fraud to those that knew the truth. He was no conqueror of Cell. A lie that he has lived for seven years. Seven long years collecting endorsement deals. Being awarded medals of honor across the globe. Receiving massive paydays for his achievement making him one of the richest people on the entire planet.

But not for long. Not as she comes to a stop with a grin underneath her black half mask before with a vicious stop a piece of ceiling tile goes soaring downward and crashing to the ground with a clang. A clang that follows suit with another as she lands down on the broken off tile and looks up with a smile forming underneath her mask. And nobody thought it would be this easy. But she knew the truth. There was no vault that could ever stop them. Much less this one. The vault of one Hercule Satan. A sealed off vault with numerous security features. An eye scanner. A fingerprint scanner. The need to not only type in a password on a keyboard into a small screen but also undo a series of padded locks with each having a different password. Such features that would take any other robber hours to get past. Luckily for her then that she wasn't some normal robber.

Dusting the cobwebs and dust that had collected on her pants from her journey making her way over towards the vault grabbing a tight hold of the vault's hand with a grin instantly Android 18 rears back with all of her might causing the sound of metal screeching to be heard. Screeching as its locks are twisted and ripped off from their handles. As the magnesiums are torn apart allowing light to make its way into the vault. Light that shines brightly inside as Android 18 moves the crunched vault door completely to the side before she looks inside.

Looks inside finding metal racks one after another filled up with wads of cash. Filled with bags of jewels from diamonds to rubys. Filled with paperwork of deeds and stock information. A whole vault that just makes her smile as she dusts her gloved hands off before swiping a nearby empty bag and starts to get to work filling the bag pushing wads of cash off the racks inside of the bag until it is filled to the brim. A cycle she repeats over and over again with numerous bags filled to the brim before the sound of a lock clicking causes her to pay a glance over her shoulder.

A click coming from the closed door leading to this vault. From locks being undone as she watches them turn before the massive door slowly opens and a familaur light coming from a flash light makes its way through the opening. A light that is followed by many more as numerous police officers and security guards soar into the room with their weapons drawn pointing them directly at her.

" Freeze!"

Cursing under her breath breaking off eye contact for a split moment to look towards the ground Android 18 narrows her eyes dangerous.

_Damn it 17! I just know it was you that screwed this up! Gohan would have never screwed this up!_

Hearing nothing but this mysterious blonde haired woman cursing under her breath beneath her black half mask without lowering down the handgun in his hand just as the leading police officer assigned to this case takes a cautious step forward suddenly he comes to a drastic halt when a pair of blue eyes snap up to glare at him angrily. Blue eyes that just sends a cold chill up and down his spine. Eyes he can't look away from as out of the corner of his eye he sees her raising her left hand and points her fingers at him in a gun motion. And what happens next? What happens next would make him along with some of his fellow officers turn in their badges in the following weeks. A sparkle coming from her index finger that strikes him clean in his right hand as though he had been hit by a bullet causing him to let out a scream of pain as the handgun goes soaring away.

A scream that is followed by another and another as her finger rapidly points at every single officer and security guard before they each drop down to their knees clutching their hands in pain. Feeling rather pleased with herself ignoring the screams of pain that fill up the room returning to her task with a grin forming underneath her black half mask slowly Android 18 shifts her attention over towards the jewels in the vault and swipes them into a nearby bag.

* * *

Umm strawberries. His favorite scent in the world. A scent that would often fill the air every single day and night. Her scent. The scent of the shampoo she would use each and every single time that she takes a shower. The very same scent that is now all over him as she uses his chest as her own personal pillow with her smooth long legs across their shared couch with her feet tucked under her while his right arm is draped around her watching the latest news story across the television set. A news story that was being considered the biggest story since the Cell Games. And he can't help but smile. The very same smile that has been across his face for the past week.

" Another job well done, I say."

Turning her head slightly away from the television to look towards Android 17 finding him looking rather pleased with himself from his leather chair rolling her eyes Android 18 scoots closer to Gohan's side and sighs in content when she feels him kissing the top of her head. Reaching out to retrieve the remote control just as her thumb comes down to change the channel suddenly a sudden change of story with an intriguing headline makes her pause.

**World Martial Arts Tournament Reopening**

A headline that just intrigues her as she listens to the announcers talk happily about the world famous tournament reopening after so many years. A tournament that they claim the very best around the world would be competing in including Mr Satan. Information that just makes Android 18 tilt her head slightly to gauge Gohan's reaction finding him look uninterested at the headline.

" So? What do you think?"

Without looking away from the screen unknown to the pair of eyes watching him casually Gohan shrugs his shoulders and pulls Android 18 closer to him.

" Who cares. I've got all i need right here."

Smiling brightly at his declaration leaning up Android 18 pecks Gohan on the cheek before just as she returns her head back down to his chest a seductive smile comes across her face. A smile that goes unnoticed as she gets up and fakes a yawn as she looks Gohan in the eyes.

" Well i'm going to bed."

Without waiting for any sort of response moving around the couch and down the hallway leading towards their shared bedroom paying a glance over her shoulder towards Gohan with a grin wagging her index finger instantly Android 18 has to suppress a laugh when she sees her boyfriend almost barreling over the back of the couch and racing over to catch up with her.

Watching their retreating backs until they are no longer in sight just as he turns his attention back towards the television screen instantly Android 17's eyes go wide in realization.

" Oh hell no!"

Snapping up to his feet quickly racing over towards the television set without any hesitation Android 17 quickly plugs in a pair of headphones in and raises the volume up to max.


End file.
